Secret SPaM – Part Three

READ SECRET SPaM PART – ONE

READ SECRET SPaM PART – TWO

This entry was posted on January 2, 2012 by H.E. ELLIS. It was filed under Holiday Interviews, Humor, SPaM and was tagged with Entertainment, Funny, holiday, Humor, life, love, porn, Sex, spam, thoughts, writing.

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28 Responses

meganstephenson

Santas got issues!

January 2, 2012 at 6:18 am

Reply
- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Nothing a day at the beach wouldn’t fix. I think El Guapo needs to take him out surfing.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 8:03 am
  
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  - El Guapo
    
    …or take him out and feed him to the sharks…either one…
    
    January 2, 2012 at 10:48 am
    
    Reply
    - H.E. ELLIS
      
      Well, yeah. There’s always that.
      
      January 2, 2012 at 10:50 am
      
      Reply
rantonit

Nicely done

January 2, 2012 at 8:13 am

Reply
- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Thanks! I had some help.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 10:50 am
  
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hrnightmare

You gotta give the big man some credit, after all he is running the #1 company in the world. All that pressure–of course he’s going to be a dick. Make no mistake I’m not defending him just because he sent me a copy of the naughty list. With pictures.

Ok yes I am.

January 2, 2012 at 8:27 am

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Pissa.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 11:09 am
  
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Edward Hotspur

I would have pegged Santa as a pot smoker. Think about it – he eats a lot, he laughs a lot, he goes inside shopping centers and allows thousands of children to sit on his lap and whine about what they want… There’s no other explanation.

January 2, 2012 at 10:02 am

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Wow…and his reindeer can FLY!!!! Makes total sense, man….
  
  Dave’s not here.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 10:06 am
  
  Reply
alanschuyler

This answers so many questions I’ve had for years!

January 2, 2012 at 10:11 am

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  It does, doesn’t it?
  
  January 2, 2012 at 10:50 am
  
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El Guapo

Thank god that menace is locked away up north for another year. thank you for revealing the true Terror Behind the Toys to us, H.E.

And now you’ve got a lifetime membership on the naughty list, so santa will be supplying coal for you for many winters to come. Cleverly played, young lady.

January 2, 2012 at 10:50 am

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  That’s right. It gets mighty cold up here in New Hampster.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 10:52 am
  
  Reply
  - Edward Hotspur
    
    That’s why you need the fireman pole.
    
    January 2, 2012 at 1:11 pm
    
    Reply
hrnightmare

I’m a fireman, just sayin.

January 2, 2012 at 1:38 pm

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Yes. Yes you are.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 1:42 pm
  
  Reply
John

So much for Jolly Old St. Nick.

January 2, 2012 at 2:10 pm

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  You’d think the eggnog would help.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 3:50 pm
  
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The Byronic Man

I’d think just the constant, relentless diet of hot cocoa and cookies would be enough to make a person crazy. “Twinkie Defense” would have nothing on Santa.

January 2, 2012 at 2:11 pm

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  And the Christmas carols. Don’t forget the Christmas Carols.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 3:51 pm
  
  Reply
lifeinthefarcelane

ROTFL @ the dB maintenance!!

January 2, 2012 at 4:23 pm

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Santa’s a pissa too.
  
  January 2, 2012 at 4:24 pm
  
  Reply
whatimeant2say

When I was in high school I wrote a much acclaimed short story in which Santa got annihilated by an errant nuclear missile. It appears that I might have been doing the world a favor.

January 2, 2012 at 5:15 pm

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Ooohhh…you’ll have to post that next year!
  
  January 2, 2012 at 5:16 pm
  
  Reply
dragonfae

Awesome! Thanks for the fun.

January 3, 2012 at 2:55 am

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- H.E. ELLIS
  
  Anytime! And by that I mean February 14th.
  
  January 3, 2012 at 5:02 am
  
  Reply
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