The sub-moronic ramblings of a semi-functioning illiterate

Canadian SPaM

People…have I’ve got news for you. I’ve stumbled onto a blog that just may be the best kept secret in WordPress. With posts that run the gamut from poignant stories of a schoolmate named Ricky to hilarious tales of dysfunctional automatic toilets, Sightsnbytes’s Blog is penned (typed, keyed, input?) by a man with a knack for story-telling that Newfoundlanders (Newfies) are famous for. Seriously, this guy makes Garrison Keillor look like a hack. For today’s SPaM post I’m pleased to feature the best thing to come out of Canada since Wayne Gretzky. Please welcome to SPaM:



**** 1. As a Newfoundlander, what do you find is the best thing about island living, and what poses the greatest challenge?

The best thing about island living is being cut off from the rest of the world, the greatest challenge is being cut off from the rest of the world


**** 2. After a bit of research I discovered that your island home is famous for it’s storytelling. How much of your cultural surroundings influence your blog posts?

Growing up in rural Newfoundland (how much more rural can you get than a community of just 80 homes, miles from the nearest town where everyone related to you), gives me lots of material for my writings. I come from a place where there really wasn’t much other to do than tell stories, so I guess this gift comes by quite honestly.


**** 3. You have a category dedicated to books. What is your favorite read ever, and what are you currently reading now that you would recommend?

My fav book ever was Brave New World, and right now I am reading the F. Scott Wilson book “The Tomb” (Repair Man Jack).


**** 4. My favorite post of yours was one entitled, “Those things we do sometimes.” In it you discuss giving your boss a rather “randy” secret Santa gift. You have a unique sense of humor to say the least, and I was curious as to where your particular brand of humor comes from.

That was quite a laugh, again, my surroundings and the fact that I am a Newfie,  probably give me the sense of humor that I have, plus, I didn’t really like that job and if I got fired, at least I would have a great story to tell.


**** 5. Since I have elected/coerced/down right forced you to speak on behalf of all Canada, what would you say is the greatest misconception other nations have about Canadians?

The greatest misconception that other nations, especially the US, have the notion  that all Canadians have dog sleds and a team of huskies, and that we live in igloos. I have a terrier and a pomeranian, and the only sled I have is an old Ski-Doo snowmobile in the shed outside.



For more Canadian SPaM goodness follow Sightsnbytes’s Blog

For more SPaM click HERE

Gear up for next week’s SPaM with guest blogger Gina from MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT


24 responses

  1. Number one is sooo True… I love living in England don’t get me wrong but being on a Island sucks for trying to go places and I am shit scared of flying!! argh 😛

    November 21, 2011 at 4:24 am

    • Kiddo, I’ve probably spent more time in commercial airliners in my life than you’ve spent in automobiles, so I have no problem flying out to you. Unless of course you and I need to walk the red carpet, then we’ll get you drunk and fly you over.

      November 21, 2011 at 8:17 am

      • Its OK because I would have to fly over drunk away because I have to get drunk at home, I will not be able to get drunk over there (Stupid Law!!!) and I have spent lots of time on airliners, ohhh get me with the American terminology 😉 (3-4 times a year to Spain since I was around 6) but I still do not like them 😛

        November 21, 2011 at 2:05 pm

  2. Sometimes Kansas feels like an island. But it’s my island. Mine.

    November 21, 2011 at 6:45 am

    • I tell you what, you keep Kansas and I’ll keep New Hampshire but we’ll split Kentucky. Deal?

      November 21, 2011 at 8:20 am

  3. He has a great blog. Thanks for the turn-on.
    But I think that line about not having dog sleds is just to throw us off…

    November 21, 2011 at 9:06 am

    • I agree. That dog sled math isn’t adding up….

      November 21, 2011 at 9:23 am

  4. I just popped over to his blog. Thanks again for leading me to another great blog!

    November 21, 2011 at 9:11 am

    • He’s really is a great storyteller. I’d fully support him getting his own radio show.

      November 21, 2011 at 9:19 am

  5. I think one other misconception, is that every one in Canada knows each other….I happen to know Sights and we live on the same Island and we actually worked together, and…wait. This isn’t helping my argument. Never mind. We all know each other up here. Practically god damned family! Even share dog sleds..oops. Forget i said that…

    November 21, 2011 at 10:27 am

    • I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!

      November 21, 2011 at 10:49 am

  6. don’t believe her, she is a mainlander! sorry Kayjai

    November 21, 2011 at 12:28 pm

  7. Ugh…betrayed..but I’m an honorary Newfoundlander for my ability to birth 2 babies on the Island. One of them epidural. Hello? Do I need any thing else to be honorary ANYTHING???!!!!

    November 21, 2011 at 1:48 pm

    • Hey, what can I say, our women are rugged here on the island. a ten lb baby? My sister had a baby that weighed in just over 16 lbs….but yes, having two babies makes you more of Newf than kissing a cod and doing a jig.

      November 21, 2011 at 2:03 pm

  8. by Texas standards that counts as a sled.

    November 21, 2011 at 8:11 pm

  9. I haven’t been this jealous of Canadians since Bob and Doug McKenzie got Geddy Lee to sing Take Off on their Great White North album!

    Je n’ai pas été jaloux de cette Canadiens depuis Bob et Doug McKenzie a obtenu Geddy Lee à chanter Take Off sur leur album Grand Nord!

    November 21, 2011 at 8:33 pm

    • I REMEMBER THAT!!!!! Wow. We’re old…

      November 22, 2011 at 10:38 am

  10. Yeah, the guy can write.

    November 22, 2011 at 1:43 am

    • Yes he can. 🙂

      November 22, 2011 at 10:38 am

  11. Thanks for doing all the work finding these great and unsung writers. Keep it up so the rest of us don’t have to!

    November 22, 2011 at 7:27 am

    • Absolutely. I wish Ted’s blog would get Freshly Pressed. He’s really something.

      November 22, 2011 at 10:37 am

  12. You guys are making me blush! A big Thank You to H.E. Ellis for all the recognition she has provided with the Canadian SPaM blog.

    To me, writing is a release from stress and all the things life throws at us sometimes. To have someone actually read what we write is the biggest compliment of all. You guys are all great writers, and I have visited and enjoyed all the blogs of everyone who have tuned into my little blog.

    November 22, 2011 at 2:52 pm

  13. Don’t want to sound dumb here, but what is ‘Freshly Pressed’?

    November 25, 2011 at 11:13 am

    • If you look up at the far left-hand corner of your blog bar you’ll see a small white circle with a blue “W” in the center. Click on that and scroll down to FRESHLY PRESSED. That will take you to a page that is like a table of contents for the whole of WordPress. Each week or so the powers that be select what they deem to be the best of certain blog topics and “feature” them on that page. It’s a big deal if you can be selected, as it drives a large amount of traffic to your site. This can be both a blessing and a curse. Just ask BrainRants.

      November 26, 2011 at 4:42 pm