The sub-moronic ramblings of a semi-functioning illiterate

Love Letters Gone Wrong – Four

It’s time time for another round of LOVE LETTERS GONE WRONG! Every Friday I feature a LOVE LETTER GONE WRONG written and submitted anonymously by fellow bloggers. Sunday morning I reveal the secret admirer’s identity with a link to the blogger’s home page. If you’d like to submit some truly heinous love letters please send them to

This week’s love letter was written and submitted by a blogger who liked my SOMEBODY SHOOT ME post. Check out this post and then return to the comments here to guess who the secret admirer is. The first correct guess wins a free copy of my ebook.


Dearest Nightingale,

I don’t know your name, and I don’t normally do this, but I just had to say something. I saw you across a crowded room as I drank my wine, and I heard you singing with your friends. You have a lovely voice! I am amazed that no one else has said anything. I see you there regularly – actually, I’m kind of a regular myself at that same place. It sure was crowded that night.

I wonder if you would do me the honor of having dinner with me? I love the way you handle yourself, and how you’re not afraid to get up in front of a large number of people. And the things you sing about – they’re bigger than the both of us.

Please let me know, as I simply must get to know you better. I was thinking tonight, or this evening. I would ask you to lunch, but I have a meeting in the afternoon with a priest and a judge and my lawyer and the priest’s lawyer and – I don’t want to bore you with the details, but I can’t wait to meet you!

Glenn McFadden

20 responses

  1. Was it Ashley? I do not know and I get it wrong every time,

    December 23, 2011 at 3:57 am

    • I’ll let you know Sunday!

      December 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

  2. PAaattrik! :O

    December 23, 2011 at 3:59 am

    • PAaattrik it is! :O

      December 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

  3. H R Nightmare

    I got this one. It is Glenn McFadden, that one was easy.

    December 23, 2011 at 5:46 am

  4. Sandy

    December 23, 2011 at 6:34 am

    • That’s one for Sandy!

      December 23, 2011 at 5:46 pm

  5. I think it’s Mr. Hotspur and he voted for someone else to throw us off track.

    December 23, 2011 at 7:55 am

    • Sandy votes Hotspur!

      December 23, 2011 at 5:47 pm

  6. Wine, Dinner….everyone assumes that a male wrote this letter, but something about this letter screams Kayjai…thats my vote, kayjai

    December 23, 2011 at 9:18 am

    • One for Kayjai!!

      December 23, 2011 at 5:47 pm

    • Good grief, I love your blog (have for some time). You know the most beautiful laides in the world and they are my inspiration. . . b/c of you. An inspiration that is much needed in the world today. Thank you so much for sharing. Blessings, Janet

      October 6, 2013 at 2:18 am

    • Sharp thinking! Thanks for the answer.

      November 28, 2013 at 2:25 am

  7. I’m going with Patrick.

    Wait, lemme rephrase that. I’m guessing Patrick.

    December 23, 2011 at 10:05 am

    • Thanks for the qualifier, John. I was starting to worry, there. 🙂

      December 23, 2011 at 5:48 pm

  8. Hmm….was it me? Cause that priest thing, yeah, that sounds like me…

    December 23, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    • Uh oh…

      I don’t remember who wrote this one. I better go find out. Yikes.

      December 23, 2011 at 5:49 pm

      • Come on Ms. Ellis he signed it. Glenn McFadden. It’s as plain as day. this is a no brainer, wait oh Snap, GingerSnaap that is. That my vote.

        December 23, 2011 at 8:39 pm

  9. Great share!

    December 28, 2011 at 9:50 am