The sub-moronic ramblings of a semi-functioning illiterate

Happy Birthday Megan!

Tomorrow is a no ordinary day; it’s a Verynormal day for our birthday girl, Megan! I really wanted to make your birthday special for you Megan, so I decided to throw you a party that was entirely British themed. First, I thought to send an invitation to Harry Potter.

But I changed my mind when I heard that Snape and Voldemort had plans to crash it.

Next I thought I’d invite Chris Martin and have him write you a birthday song.

But since he’s both a tool and a douchebag I decided to go sporty instead and invited…

David Beckham.

Sadly, Gingersnaap wouldn’t let him out of her basement. Thinking I’d go younger, I invited…

Robert Pattinson.

Unfortunately, Simon Pegg mistook him for a zombie and shot him.

After doing nothing right, I decided to make myself happy by going to Scotland for..




14 responses

  1. Ohh you have so made me want to watch 300, nom nom nom. 4 hours baby, and I will be ermmm… That age πŸ˜‰

    April 14, 2012 at 3:05 pm

    • I love me some King Leonidas, alright. Happy Birthday Megan!

      April 14, 2012 at 3:19 pm

    • 20 ? :O It’s a depressing age to be…… not legally allowed to drink yet drunk….. Much like I’m sure H is now seeing as she brought up the pale sparkly bastard.
      …. Luckily so am I atm :O.
      Happy Birthday Megan! πŸ™‚ .

      April 14, 2012 at 3:42 pm

      • Ahaha Cheeky, I am 19 tomorrow and I am English so I can drink away πŸ˜‰

        April 14, 2012 at 3:44 pm

        • really, I was just kidding about the age issue….. Everyone’s perpetually drunk anyways :-/ .
          Have funnn! :D….. Could’ve sowrn you were already 19 (0.o)

          April 15, 2012 at 7:24 am

  2. Aw yes Ms. Megan, how quickly you have grown. Seems like just 3 months and 2 weeks ago you began your pissa training and look at you now. A full fledged Pissa master.
    they grow up so fast (tears beginning to form< wait nevermind i got dirt in my eye)

    April 14, 2012 at 3:06 pm

    • Aww…so sentimental.

      April 14, 2012 at 3:19 pm

  3. Happy Birthday Megan!!

    I suppose I can let David out for a few hours, in honor of your special day. Just let me find his shock collar and leash and we will be right over!

    And H.E.? Me gusta Senor Butler- he is very yuuummmmmyyyyyyy.

    April 14, 2012 at 3:06 pm

    • Si, Senor Butler es muy caliente.

      April 14, 2012 at 3:18 pm

  4. Happy Birthday Megan!
    I’ll throw in some oil for Gerards loincloth.

    Have a great day and year to follow!

    April 14, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    • You’re killing me, El Guapo.

      April 14, 2012 at 3:18 pm

  5. Happy Birthday, Megan!

    April 14, 2012 at 3:35 pm

  6. Happy Burps Meg! Do whatever they do over there!

    April 17, 2012 at 12:16 am

  7. Pingback: Happy Normal Birthday! | H.E. ELLIS